The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.
What's the use of a good quotation if you can't change it?
Underneath this flabby exterior is an enormous lack of character.
You can't say that civilization don't advance, however, for in every war they kill you in a new way.
It is a far, far better thing to have a firm anchor in nonsense than to put out on the troubled sea of thought.
I never vote for anyone; I always vote against.
A man may be so much of everything that he is nothing of anything.
Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.
Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love.
The saving grace of humor: If you fail no one is laughing at you.