We must believe in luck. How else can we explain the success of those we don't like?

George Carlin

Tonight's weather forecast: Dark, turning to widely scattered light in the morning.

I like winter because I can stay indoors without feeling guilty.

Dan Quisenberry

The future is much like the present, only longer.

Last night I dreamed I ate a ten-pound marshmallow, and when I woke up the pillow was gone.

If I had to live my life again, I'd make the same mistakes, only sooner.

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